Shrek the third

As they didn't bother to write a script, should I bother writing a review?

There was no story, the animation was often ropey.

I was bored.

lazy - 1 / 10

FANTASTIC FOUR: RISE OF THE SILVER SUFER

This was the first new film I'd seen in a number of weeks. On account of there being no new films out I wanted to see, plus there being films on at my local cinema that I'd seen but were worth watching again

I went to this cinema this evening on the bat of having worked the last 7 days in a row. I was tired and had been sat in front of a computer for 10 hours with a bit of a hangover. Still I tired to suppress all my expectations, I thought I'd go with an open mind and hoped to be pleasantly surprised.

Suffice to say I WAS NOT PLEASANTLY SURPRISED.

There was wooden acting, bad blue screen, wooden characters, super-heroes with rubbish super powers, rubbish plot lines. Even Jessica Alba didn't look good for the whole time I was watching. There were cheesy lines, the guy who played William Wilberforce in Amazing Grace was like the wooden guy from the Cuprinol adverts. The story didn't hang together. The final action sequence was shot on the same stage as the final scene of Superman I.

I hadn't seen the 1st film in this series so was confused by the continuing plots.

Stan Lee has a cameo role in this film - he must've been hanging his head in his hands when he saw how the makers of this film had destroyed his many hours of creative work on the original comics.

DO NOT GO TO SEE THIS FILM.

It does not even merit a mark out of 10. A thoroughly disappointing film

Zodiac

After Panic Room, David Fincher has bounced back and made a stylish, intelligent and very well made film. He has reigned in a lot of his crazy camera moves (that probably wouldn't have been appropriate in this 1970s based film), and kept a restrained hold on a story that spans about fifteen years.

Yes, it is sprawling, yes it is long, and yes, the end isn't as good as a fictional one but this is a quality film.

I'm glad Fincher is back, I just hope it doesn't take so long for his next film to come out.

8/10

Paradise Lost

After viewing the trailer package with this film, I am a bit worried. Films are getting a bit sick at the moment. All the trailers were for torture horror - it's getting a bit old now, so it looks like they are just going to get gorier and sicker.

That's ok every so often, but where have the supernatural horrors gone?

They don't even have proper zombies anymore...

I'm sure it'll all be cyclical and there'll be remakes of Nightmare on Elm Street and stuff in two years time.

Probably with even more gore.

Anyway, on to the business in hand - Paradise Lost.

It begins a bit like The Beach - a bunch of tourists are in a bus crash and so are left stranded somewhere in Brazil. Luckily, they find a spectacular beach nearby, with an amazing bar and get absolutely hammered. They awake the next morning to find that they have been robbed, the bar is gone and they are lost.

And hunted.

Then, unfortunately it becomes a bit of a torture horror. Which is a shame, it could have been done much more subtly and made this film a lot better. Although I was complaining about torture horror a couple of minutes ago, it is okay, if done well; however, the huge amount of them coming out at the moment leaves this film in the middle of the pile in that genre and as such, will be forgotten about.

I'm not going to give away the reason for the tourists being hunted, but I thought that the premise was good, and could have made a really good horror film, rather than this mediocre film.

I will leave this review with a positive note though - there is a chase sequence set in underwater caves - it is pretty cool.

Anyway, enough rambling about this film.

4/10